Black Sushi Chef
by Ampersand of Destiny
Summary: Lau and Sebastian make a secret deal. Ciel tries to handle work without Sebastian. Finian has no f***ing clue who he is. Mey-Rin is hot, naked, and part fish (that bit turned you off, didn't it?). Bardoy will probably burn dinner again. Lizzy is annoying, Agni cooks like he's Jesus, Viscount Druitt is a dramatic mess, and Grell is the most fabulous shinigami to ever live.


Ciel closed his eyes and sighed. Bardroy had gotten the delivery information wrong again. Ciel had requested the day's catch for salmon, not seaweed.

_Seaweed isn't even a fish_, he thought. _He should know by now that Funtom Sushi Company uses only its own seaweed._

"Lizzy!" he yelled down the hall. "Call Bard and tell him that's he is a useless idiot!"

Elizabeth pranced into Ciel's office.

"Yes, Ciel! Do you want me to give him an actual phone call or just use the prerecorded message?"

Ciel propped his head up under his arm and looked at the corner of the ceiling.

"I don't care. Just make sure it sounds threatening." He eyed Elizabeth's choice of clothing for the day, which was a pink and frilly dress. Ciel felt as though the brightness of her smile was giving him a sunburn.

"On second thought, perhaps I'd better call," Ciel said, wincing. Lizzy smiled wider and nodded.

"Okay! Let me know if you need anything else!" She walked out of the office and shut the door. Ciel sighed again and glared at the closed door. He reached for the desk phone, but it began ringing before he could pick it up. He felt a growing desire to hurt someone, then answered the phone.

"Who is it and what do you want?"

"You sound displeased, master. Is everything all right?" Ciel exhaled in relief.

"Sebastian. I'm so glad it's not another idiot."

"Sir, are you saying that you are an idiot or that I am an idiot?"

"Oh, shut up!" He ran his gaze across the financial information on his desk.

"What are you calling for?"

"I wished to inform you that I would be running late. I encountered an old friend of ours." Ciel's exposed eye widened.

"Which one?"

"Lau."

Ciel leaned back in his desk chair.

"We can deal with him later. Just get back as quickly as possible."

"Yes, my lord." Sebastian hung up.

Ciel looked at the clock on his wall and then closed his eyes. It was only eight in the morning.

"Lizzy!" he called out. A few seconds later, she bounded into the office, optimistic and naive as ever.

"Could you please get me some tea?

Sebastian put his cell phone away and dropped the silverware that he held between his fingers.

"I hate to be so rude, but I simply must be going now."

He closed his eyes and smiled, as if to mock Lau. Ran-Mao scowled at him from under his foot. Lau walked down the middle of the bridge to where Sebastian stood on the other side, in spite of the traffic rushing around them. His calm demeanor and nonchalant smile gave his approach an almost eerie and threatening quality.

"Only a matter of time before Tanaka Sushi goes down," he said, appearing somewhat prophetic with the sun at his back.

Sebastian concealed his surprise at the statement. It was impossible for Lau to know that Funtom needed Tanaka Sushi to stay in business. Without it, Ciel would be running a citywide monopoly and be forced to close their most profitable location. That could not happen. It would violate the contract.

Sebastian smirked, his blood-red eyes shining with malice.

"We'll just see about that," he said, and shot off down the street.

Lau looked over at Ran-Mao and gave her a confused expression.

"What is he talking about? I just meant that Tanaka Sushi looked very rundown."

Ciel wasn't done with his tea when he heard a knock on his door.

"Come in," he said. Sebastian stepped into the office.

"Pardon the intrusion. I have some urgent news, master." Ciel gestured his head at the entrance.

"Shut the door." Sebastian shut the door and straightened his tie.

"My lord, Lau appears to know about our need for Tanaka Sushi to remain open." He gave a displeased expression with the next sentence, as though the words tasted bad in his mouth.

"I believe he intends to put them out of business." Ciel stood up and put his hands on his desk. He trembled violently.

"W-what? That CANNOT happen, Sebastian!" He ripped off his eyepatch, revealing his purple eye, with a pentacle at its center.

"Sebastian, this is an order!" His purple eye glowed with an unholy light.

"You are to obey the owners of Tanaka Sushi as you would obey me! Keep them in business." His eyes narrowed.

"At _any_ price."

Sebastian bowed.

"Yes, _my lord_."

Ciel picks up a heavy box, then drops it on his foot.

"Young master, you mustn't be so pathetic in my absence."

Ciel yells into his desk phone.

"Oh, my apologies, master. What I meant was: These tasks aren't fit for an Earl of Phantomhive."

Lau is seen briefly, speaking.

"Be careful of Lau, my lord. He may be just a pawn, but if he reaches the other side of the board, he becomes a queen."

Grell grins, love struck, and small hearts appear around his head. He clings flirtatiously to the chest of a cold, impassive Sebastian.

"Ah, I keep forgetting. Being a queen is Grell's job."

Viscount Druitt eats a sushi roll and swoons, pontificating romantically about the qualities of the food.

"If I couldn't put a human soul into a sushi roll, what kind of a sushi chef would I be?

"Next time on Black Sushi Chef: His Sushi Chef, Contractor. You see, I am simply one _hell_ of a sushi chef."


End file.
